Self talk can become undisciplined and toxic.

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Terri Lee Cooper Msc. RSW.

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We all talk to ourselves.

Some of us mumble quietly, some of us mutter out loud. But the wheels are always turning in our minds. We all experience internal chatter. Our inner dialogue is nothing more then a reflection of our thoughts and our thoughts create our reality. Getting a handle on our self talk is one of the most powerful things that we can do for ourselves. Our internal conversations can cheer us on or sabotage us.  

We are in constant internal dialogue about: ourselves, others and the world around us. We are always gathering information, making assessments and using internal discourse to validate our experience and beliefs. When it comes down to it, our internal dialogue is simply the process of forming thoughts. Our thoughts are nothing more then words and visual representations (the pictures we form in our minds). Unfortunately, many people have internal dialogue that feels out of control and unhealthy. Internal dialogue can become a habitual patterned response that lacks creativity and "here and now" reality checks.

When we are not in charge of our self talk, our well being can suffer on all levels. Our thinking affects our mind, body and spirit. In addition, when our internal dialogue is unhealthy it “leaks” out into our interactions and relationships with others. We pass on the results of poor internal dialogue on to our children, spouses, friends, co-workers etc. Plenty of emotional damage can be traced back to unhealthy internal dialogue.

Self talk can become undisciplined and toxic.

Most people have a basic understanding that our thoughts are powerful. People know the importance of being “positive” however; we can see that most people’s understanding is superficial. What most people do not fully appreciate is that our runaway thoughts are programming our subconscious mind through their intensity and through repetition.  

The goal given to the subconscious mind through self talk can be helpful or not, the subconscious mind does not make judgments. We can give it commands through our internal dialogue that have the potential to bring us great joy or make us feel emotionally or physically sick. 

There is often an intense desire to be able to pull a switch that will just turn off the thoughts. Often people who experience difficulties with addictions will complain about not being able to shut off their minds and still the inner chatter. 

The truth is that our internal dialogue is very powerful and it IS within the control of the majority of people, with the right support.

Managing our internal dialogue is much more realistic then aiming to stop our thoughts. Interrupting unhealthy internal dialogue and replacing it makes more sense then trying to turn off our minds. We need to engage in honest self discovery and realistic success planning if we are to initiate lasting change. 

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