Note-you will receive more value from the blog articles if you have begun the Self-Discovery Confidence Building Workbook. The concepts are relevant whether your concern is anxiety, depression, addictions, anger or weight issues. A lack of self-confidence and belief in the self are significant factors in all life challenges.
Have you learned to identify yourself as an "angry person?" If so, it may be time to question whether that label is serving you. Any one of us can make the decision to create a stronger belief in our ability to manage stress and frustration. Anger is a normal and natural emotion and we all experience it to some degree. I certainly do, in fact I can get downright PISSED under certain circumstances. However, I do not identify myself as an "angry person."
"Words like impatient, irritable, short fused, antagonistic, easily ruffled, powerless, passive-aggressive,
bad tempered, sulky, full of rage, immature or abusive may come to mind when one describes a person
who is chronically angry.
However, the mind can be influenced into accepting a more calm and confident self-image if it’s learning needs are met." excerpt from the Understanding and Managing Anger Mini-Workbook-please feel free to email me and request a copy.
When we perceive people as being in charge of their emotions, we might describe them as having a strong belief in themselves, being composed, secure and self-assured. I believe that these people have chosen to become the confident CEO of their lives. They have committed to becoming more self-aware and have over time developed mindsets and behaviors that move them closer to their goals rather then continually tending to sabotage progress.
It is natural to feel upset when our rights have been impeded or things do not go our way. Often anger stems from the frustration of our efforts not baring fruit. When we feel like we are banging our head against the wall, putting time and energy into solving challenges but not seeing any new measurable results we certainly can become stressed and irritable.
What is important is how we choose to express anger. Being angry and having anger issues are two very different things. Uncontrolled anger (adult temper tantrums) can be passive or highly explosive. Either way it can result in serious loss (relationships, employment, health issues and/or criminal charges.
It can be hard to admit that you have issues with anger. However, awareness is critical if changes are to occur. When we experience automatic anger, we give our power away. This is not a life that is fueled by self-confidence.
When we allow external circumstances and past challenges to determine our frame of mind we cease to be in control of our lives. We become the confident CEO of our lives when we begin to take charge of our thoughts, feelings and behaviors.
How we deal with anger is a learned response. The primitive mind has over time accepted ways of being that interfere with managing conflict (internal and external) in constructive manner. Angry people seem to have a lot of “hot buttons” and are easily triggered. Learning to take charge of our responses is possible when we build our belief in self and reconnect with our potential.
Terri Lee Cooper MSc. RSW