ADDICTION RECOVERY/SOBER IDENTITY-DESERVING BETTER
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Even if your life is falling apart because of an addiction or problem use,
on some level you must believe that you deserve a healthier more satisfying life. You would not be here otherwise. Your spouse and children also deserve a better life. You
may be facing relationship breakdowns, health issues and financial concerns due
to the addiction yet still there is a part of you that knows you were not meant
to live this way.
Deserving better is not about entitlement or self-indulgence. It is about recognizing that the light within never goes out. Our potential is meant to be expressed.
This is not who I really am.
Deserving more requires a change and change is scary.
We know that people come back from the edge. From a feeling
of failure to a feeling of joy, meaning and accomplishment, the road begins
with the knowing that you were meant for more. In spite of the challenges you
have faced related to your addiction or problem use, within there still remains some small
measure of hope, or you would not be here, reading.
Knowing that you deserve more is not arrogant; it does not
signal that you are coming from a place of entitlement. Rather, it demonstrates a deep knowing that your inner worth is still intact
regardless of past actions and decisions. We are born with an inner worth, a
value that does not get diminished via life’s hard lessons.
If we can be humble
enough to recognized that we have not yet lived into our potential, accept the
disappointment of that and move from the idea of “healing” to the idea of
“growing” we can see that each one of us does in fact deserve to live a
healthy, abundant meaningful life.
An important changes takes some work. In order to move to the next level in any area of our lives we will always require new thoughts and behaviors. This can be scary without a road map. When our minds have not yet formulated what life could be like it is very easy for our subconscious mind to stay fixated on “what is” simply because it is familiar. Even that which is familiar can be painful.
We need to put our attention towards how life can be. What would be different for you…be specific. If it is difficult for you to imagine a life without an addiction then begin by doing some research…who has been able to turn their life around, how is their life different now then before? What we want to see is those who have made the shift and now live with a sense of freedom, not a sense of cautiously counting the days.
Terri Lee Cooper MSc. RSW